Happy Halloween!

Hammie:  I can’t find our Halloween pumpkin!  Did you see it?
Audrey:  I traded it for my princess costume.
Hammie:  All we got is squash!  No PUMPKINS!
Audrey:  They look like pumpkins to me.
Hammie:  If we don’t have a pumpkin, it isn’t Halloween!
Audrey: I have to be a princess.  I’m the most beautiful princess in all the world!  What are you, Hammie?
Hammie:  I am a cowboy indian.
Audrey: There’s no such thing as a cowboy indian.  Why don’t you be a frog so I can kiss you?
Hammie:  YUCK NO!  No kissing.  I guess it doesn’t matter anyways.  We can’t go trick or treating ’cause there’s no doors to knock on, and we have no PUMPKIN!
Audrey:  Maybe if we are really good, we will get CANDY!
Hammie: Who’s gonna give it yo us?
 Nanny:  And WHAT my little dears are we fussing about now?
Audrey:  We don’t get to go trick or treating ’cause there’s no doors.
Nanny:  Well, that IS a problem now.  Let’s see what Nanny has under her magic apron….
Audrey:  CANDY!!!!!!!!!
Hammie:  YIPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(lots of crunching and munching noises)
Nanny:  This won’t be all you’re having for your Halloween.  I have a very special dinner planned for you! 
 Hammie:  Oh!  That is my favourite dinner in the whole wide world!
Audrey:  Mine too!

Stuck and Thinking

We are stuck in either Utah or Wyoming.  It’s crazy sometimes not to know where you are.  I-80 is closed (due to a snow storm) and the company shut us down (meaning we can’t drive).  Apparently this happens a lot in this town, as we received a map of all the local places that trucks can park.  We are luckily parked in a Walmart, so we got some fresh veggies, a few packages of sausages and pantry items for the next run after home-time.  It was a little hard to walk past the fabric section of the store….I really wanted to roam around in there, but husband was with me and that bores the heck out of him.  What was nice, is that the cashier had a pumpkin filled with candy and I was able to take two small rolls of candy that I can give to Audrey and Hamlet for Halloween!  That worked perfectly!

I wanted to do a little Halloween story yesterday, but everything was so up in the air with the shut down and husband needed to sit in front at my worktable with his computer to watch for any changes.  So I just played games on my computer.  I will see if I can dress the children up when it gets light out and at least take a picture.

I also spent some time pouring over names for the new girl.  I liked Annamerete, Merete was my mother’s best friend and we use to visit her.  I have a hard time with names that I know someone by, because I feel it belongs to them and I am stealing it!  lol.  I also like Rosemarie, and just plain Anna.  The problem I am having is that the seller’s photo’s are washed out, so she looks very sweet and plain, the DDE photo shows her quirky look that I love so much.  I tried to switch back and forth on the pictures as I say a name out loud, but they look like two different sculpts!  I think naming will have to wait until I have her in person.

I have been thinking about her quick wardrobe that I have to make while home.  I am thinking of making a couple of thin fabric under dresses and then making several over the dress pinafores.  It would be nice to be able to mix and match them to extend the wardrobe without too many pieces.  I have at least one dress so she has something to wear while I pull it all together.

While home, I want to also create better bedding for the cubbies.  There is a metal edge along the side and I am always afraid of resin noses and ears getting chipped from all the bouncing.  I would like to pad it somehow, but how to get it to stay will take some creativity.  At this point I am thinking of padded fabric that fits like a basket lining inside and over hangs on the outside with pockets for their books and toys.

For Hammie and Audrey, the cubby is too deep, I have the bottom lined with my wooden knitting needle holder and a mattress on top of that.  I wrapped them in their blankets to prevent being bumped on that metal edge.
Oh well…..still stuck wherever we are.  A long day ahead I believe.  I think I will go in a look at fabric after breakfast!

Naming, clothing ideas

I went through many names yesterday, and decided on all three of my Dollzones will have Danish names.  I am writing down the different names that appeal to me, and then spend time with each companion and see what fits.

Names for girls that I like:

I also bought a lambs wool hair wig today.  It is called honey in the colours, but the photo looks sort of beige-y.  I would prefer not having any yellow tones, but if it comes as a horrible colour, I will dye it myself.  I will eventually switch the children’s hair to the same type of wig.  I really love the feel of it and the fun wildness.  Perfect for little Nisse’s.

I also collected lots of pictures of traditional Danish and Sami folk dress.  I will be using them as an idea base for designing their clothes.  I started collecting some old style house interiors for the room I will eventually build them. 

I am envision my new girl as about 12 years old.  She would be pale, soft doe colours, gentle and sweet.   Both the children are tan skinned an bright in the colouring, so I would like her to be the fair one.  I may do a light sprinkle of freckles across her nose.  I am considering reducing her bust size, I will wait until she is present to find all the right nuances that she will need.  I will also have to be quick on making some very basic clothing, undergarments, 2 dresses, an apron and a night gown at the very least.  I can knit her a sweater and hat later.  I know I have a pair of black boots for her, but I cannot remember if there are any other MSD size shoes in the cupboard.
I have been thinking about what I will take back to my parents and leave behind (even if it is only for the next 5 weeks).  I think that I will take Olivia the Pig, Miriam and Nanny back, giving them a rest from traveling and this then will give me a chance to get to know the new girl.  I can make her a bed in the cubby and she can help with the children.
Guess for the next 10 days or so, all I can do is dream and scheme!

Musing and Dreaming

I think I was smiling all evening thinking about DZ Fei.  I played with her photo, changing the color of her hair and eyes, I even added freckles to see the look!  I looked up tons of names, I just gazed at her and dreamed.  I cannot wait to try on wigs and eyes and find her. 

So many dolls that have come and gone were quick decisions, someone that caught my eye and was affordable at the moment.  Few have been chosen after a long period of desire.  Evie was chosen.  I poured over her picture, longing and wishing and hoping I could find a way to buy her.  I had Denver Doll hold Evie (DIM Eunbi) and a Souldoll Clara.  As soon as DDE opened the box, I knew I had found my companion girl.

Audrey wasn’t even conceived of when I found her, but what I found in her I had long desired.  In fact, I had been looking at many different dolls that appealed to me, as I wanted a smaller or a single doll as a companion on the truck adventure we were about to have.  I had a whole list of dolls to look at when I went up to Denver Doll, but one, right after the other seemed somehow “not the one”.  Then, while gazing through the many gorgeous dolls, I spied Audrey.  I picked her up and smiled.  She smiled back….I was hooked.  In one previous visit to Denver Doll, I had picked up a Dollzone Megi and was so surprised by him.  He did not have the look I liked, his eyes were crazy slanted, his nose tipped up, but the more I held him, the more he grew on me.  He had a wonderful weight to him, he had such clear and bright eyes and such smooth resin skin……I really liked him!  He was more than I could afford that day, and I set him down, thinking that I wasn’t there to find a boy anyways.  But I never forgot him.  Finding Audrey was like finding that DZ Megi, such a delight.  And it was odd, because I never liked her DZ stock photo!  In fact, both Audrey and Hammie had the most hideous yellow eyes.  *shudder*

Hamlet was desired next, because I loved Audrey and wanted an interactive play between two children.  But all along, I have been missing my Evie something fierce.  She is simply too big to be a comfortable situation on the truck.  I bought a Tonner Judy Garland, who has been so sweet and intense, but I dislike holding her.  It’s those Tonner bodies I can’t stand.  I had a Tonner Kitty Collier that I felt the same way about.  Loved her when looking at her, but holding her was like holding a hollow shell.  This is why I love resin so much, there is weight to it.  I also bought Nanny, thinking of more interactive play, but they are both sort of “characters” and not a companion to me.  I kept thinking that if I could only find a companion that was sort of personal to me, yet could fit in with the children, I would be able to have 3 companions on the truck and have everything I needed, children to play with and an older companion to talk to.

Finding DZ Fei on eBay was such an exciting moment.  I think Dollzone creates the worst stock photo’s of their dolls.  Looking at them make me wince.  But Denver Doll had a “owner” photo on their website (the one I posted yesterday) and her face appealed to me.  This is why I knew the one on eBay was the one.  She was ready, could come to me by my birthday,  and well, all the rest.  So by that one photo, I had wanted DZ Fei for a very long time. 

Thinking about this last night, I realized that I now have two “families”.  I have Evie and Noah whom are both DIM dolls and now Audrey, Hammie and Fei who are Dollzone.  I like that feeling of completeness.  Another thing that has come together is the family story, the overall purpose of their being, the creative play I can indulge in.  I’ve had bits and pieces of it over the last few years, but now, it all seems to fall into place.

Everyone will have a new name and a new place in my companionship world.  I am still working out the details, but soon I will reveal it.  Right now, it is dream-time!

DZ Fei is Fate

I don’t think I could be more shocked. 

Last night, I laid in bed thinking about DZ Fei.  I thought about the first photo I had seen of her on DDE:

There was something about her quirky looks, her peaceful sadness.  There are only a few DZ’s I like, I like Megi, Ani and Kay and of course, Fei.  I had thought many times I would eventually try for her.  It took a long time for Hammie to arrive and it seemed that I wouldn’t be able to even try for her until next year.  Then I thought about the only DZ Fei I have ever seen on eBay.  I thought her auction ended last night and so just resigned myself that she would not be the one.  I think I looked at her a hundred times yesterday.  I just couldn’t bring myself to ask my husband if I could have her.  Not so soon after Hammie.  I tried to put her out of my mind and dismiss the thoughts, perhaps since no other MSD ever stayed long in my heart, it would be a mistake.
Then this morning, as I was setting up my computer, my mouth opened and I told my husband I wanted to see what the doll I had been wanting so badly went for.  I surprised myself, I had spoken before thinking, I had not planned saying anything.  Besides the auction, I was sure ended the night before.  If no one had bought her, I may have a chance, but surely someone would have gotten her.  But lo and behold, her auction was still active and there was 4 hours left!  When I I shouted with excitement, husband then asked more about her, and I quipped something about letting me bid….well, sure, he said!  If I win, she could be my combined birthday and Christmas present!  And….just as sure I was about marrying him….I was sure she was coming home to me!
And she is!  This is her auction photo:
The wig doesn’t come with her, but I have several wigs at my parent’s house that I can try.  I am so excited and so pleased that she is coming.  This one feels like fate. 


I have been so sad and indecisive the last week or so.  Indecision has a way of putting everything on hold.  I noticed that when I get like this, I stop playing and enjoying my companions.  Then I see them and their sad faces and feel the most awful guilt and I feel even worse.

One day I saw Audrey looking so forlorn, so I picked her up.  I kept her by me all day, alternating with holding her and sitting her next to my computer so that I could touch her.  She did soothe me.  She always does.  I love this child.

The next day I did the same with Hammie.  I kept thinking that there was something not quite right about Hammie, something that keeps him a boy to look at, instead of a boy that is mine.  I finally figured out what was wrong, it was his eyes.  I tried the side glance to take away the bug eyed stare.

Since his eye sockets are so large, the eyes needed to be almost cross-eyed to appear as though he is looking into your eyes, rather than always appearing wall-eyed, or glancing off into the distance.  Once I changed the position and he actually looked at me, I was suddenly overwhelmed with love for him.

I am glad to have had this connection with him, I spent the whole day holding him and looking into his eyes.  Yet, as it always happens, I find myself searching through hundreds of doll pictures, imagining, wondering, seeking, wishing, dreaming and down right lusting after a new companion.
Why?  My little urchins surrounded me with love and I seek more!  To compound matters, the very doll I had wanted Dollzone Fei (female version) came up on ebay and for a good price.  I spent an entire day trying to come up with an idea to present to my husband of why and how I needed this doll.  I thought bout who I could sell to come up with at least part of the money and then I thought there might be a chance to justify it being both a birthday and a christmas present.  I schemed, and plotted and could not come up with the guts to ask him if I could “borrow” the money from savings.  Why?
I contacted the seller and told her I was interested but couldn’t do anything until I was home in November.  I asked if she had not sold the doll in this auction, if maybe she would consider me as a buyer.  She wrote back right away and said yes.  That gave be hope of an extension, but then the same issue is at hand.  I would have to come up with the money and I dare not.  We fell short of the miles for last month and are a bit behind in the monthly savings goal.  Husband bought a very expensive new GPS last month and so we “dipped” into the savings for that.  I also just received Hammie, so I can see him saying no to this whole deal.  In fact, I am sure of it.  I hate to ask and be told no.
And then I wonder about the sanity of it.  MSD size has always been an “off” size for me.  I have long wanted to stop the size differences and just a few weeks ago decided that I would someday hope to get Dollzone Zhuwei or if I am really lucky, another boy too.  If I had 4 nisser, I could some day build the little hobbity type house for them, with cabinet beds all painted in rosemalling.  My vision is the children, Aloe Vera (living in a bird nest or cage) and Evie and Noah reigning as King and Queen of the land.  I thought of Dollzone Fei as being the princess that comes to visit the nisser and the fairy.  If my realm was complete, I would add one more fairy….a blue fairy.
Then I think, I don’t need four children, two will do.  I don’t need more fairies and princesses are nice to have but not necessary.  I can still have my ideas work out with who I already have.  And thus the sad and depressing cycle starts over again.
Last night I searched through DOA looking for some pretty pictures to soothe my ruffled feathers and found that Limwha was taking my breath away.  I wanted the half elf so bad.  Again, my mind churned with….who can I sell and how long would it take to make the money if I carved more dolls, made more porcelain ones……on and on the churning went until I felt like a fool.  Over $500 for a doll.  What the hell am I thinking?  I can;t afford new clothes let alone even consider a doll like that.  And then what?  Drag such a fine young lady on a truck….when obviously Evie and Noah were so cumbersome in their size?
See what I mean?  I swing like a pendulum and this has been going on for an entire year!  Poor DZ Fei’s auction ends today.  Oh how I wish a miracle would happen and I would know what the right thing to do is. 

Nanny and I have a sewing circle this morning

It was Nanny who woke me up this morning.  She was insistent on getting to work on at least one of her unfinished dresses first thing this morning.  She tapped her foot as I made coffee and clicked her fingernails on the table as I got dressed.  She was very impatient.

We piled the unfinished dresses on the table and she picked one out for me to start on.  That soon became a big problem for Nanny.  Apparently, I do not sew as fine as she does.  My stitches were not small enough, my thread was too long, I wasn’t wearing my thimble, I knotted my thread….”We NEVER knot threads, dear”.

So Nanny shook her head and went and got her own sewing tin and proceeded to lecture me on proper hand sewing.

I was surprised to see she had her own tiny assortment of thread, buttons and even a first aid kit.  I guess Nanny’s are always prepared.
Nanny started showing me exactly how I am to hand finish her dresses.  She worked on one, and I worked on the other.  There was lace that needed to be stitched, bodice lining to be sewn around the sleeves and waist, sleeves to be hemmed.
Then Nanny said that she needed her bloomers to be fixed.  The elastic had lost it’s give and so she made four knife pleats and that did the trick.
Then we looked at the antique petticoat slip that came on a china head body, and while a bit lose on the waist we decided that would be ok, making it comfortable.  We admired the beautiful hand made lace along the edge.  Nanny was quite pleased with this garment.
The first dress is done and the apron too, Nanny was very pleased.  She walks with her candy cane and likes to have candy cane print on her dresses.   She winked and said that someday she’ll tell me the story of her cane. 
“When you’re a little older, dear” is all she said.