Evie’s First Month

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We are at the Yard now.  A day or two here and then we’ll head to Colorado.  I am so excited, as this will mean 2 whole months off the truck!  YAY!  What a treat that will be.  Cooking without bouncing…..on a real stove….a bathroom whenever I want one….I am just giddy with delight!

Evie has done really well on this last run…her first as a child on the truck.  In comparison to Audrey and Hammie, she is a little more awkward, as she has the typical bjd overly long colt like legs that seem to constantly need placement…somewhere other than where they are.  Audrey and Hammie have short legs and they are always so easy to have around, easy to hold and easy to tuck away somewhere.  Evie needs attention, care in where she is placed and where she sleeps.  Thank heavens for the hammock, it was the best thing for her.

I had worried about bonding with her in a new form but that was never in the equation once I saw her in the box.  Her face changes constantly, depending on the angle and the lighting, giving her so many very human looks.  She hasn’t the typical sweet look with perfect idealized dolly face at all.  There are times she looks positively homely.  But it is this very essence that I love so much about her.  Now that I have spent this first month with her, I know exactly how to bring out what I see in her to her best advantage.

If I could change anything about her, it would be her legs.  I wish they didn’t make such long ones.  I don’t think the legs are well designed they twirl so easily and her left knee joint doesn’t stay locked went sitting, often wonking out.  Standing and posing are wonderful, the knee will stay in place, but if I leave her alone and come back to her, the knee seems to do it’s own thing.  I will be sueding to see if that helps.

I noticed that having Evie with me created a sense of inner peace that I have not had in such a long time dolly-wise.   Audrey and Hammie were delightful fun, so playful and cheerful for me, but Evie is like having a relationship.  I found myself talking to her, interacting with her which is different than just watching Hammie and Audrey play.  Thinking about the differences helps me start the process of what to do with the rest of my dolls and when to stop buying and selling, or at least put off the thoughts until I am ready.  At least I can say that at this point, I am not in any hurry.  I have some ideas, things I will test out when I am home, alone and have the time to sort it all out.  Audrey and Hammie have a nicked a place in my heart, it may be that they stay in the end.  As we are back to talking about shipping our household when the time comes, it makes it easier to consider keeping dolly things.

I watched Evie throughout her first month, trying to see a style, a colouring, something to help me make decisions on her clothing, her room, the toys she might like, the books to read.  As I have confessed so many times, I love historical periods of dress and love to dabble in it.  I have seen some gorgeous Dollstown girls dressed in Victorian style looking so fabulous that I was tempted to go in that direction.  But then I look at Evie and she is just not all all Victorian.  My imagination continues to wrap her up in my own childhood memories and I think that I want us to share that special time together.  When I think of taking her to the places that I played as a child in Denmark, I am just beyond myself with joy.  I would love to re-create the clothing I wore then and be able to take pictures of her in those places. The truck seems to be such a time-less place, so that I think she can sort of hover in the twilight realm of today and yesterday without much of a leap of imagination.  This is a quirk of mine, I like things to make sense.  lol.

As I should be home in a few days, my mind is clicking on all the things I will get to do.  Meeting Mr Hackensack will be interesting, the wedding will be fun and getting Evie all “right” will be a joy.  I want to re-do the sewing room too, it needs organization.  I want to set up Frank’s Place for Frank and Lucy to enjoy and make sure the Hackensacks have their little corner and of course, work on Miette’s room too.  I have lists of things I need, but until I go through a few more unpacked boxes, I won’t know what I did keep.

Well, I am rambling on…..I probably won’t post again until I am home and settled.  Oh…and we have company coming from Denmark!  That ought to be fun, friends of my husband that I have not met yet.

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The Many Faces of Evie

Nothing new.  Just waiting.  And waiting for the days to pass in order to get to my Evie.  I read this morning on DOA some wonderful comments about Seola and her posing.  I read that many feel that Dollstown sculpts have so many expressions that seem to change.  I like that.  My hopes are hoping that I have found what I have been seeking.

I like unusual faces.  I like quirky looks.  I was looking at my Blue Book for Dolls and loved so many wonderful faces that just beamed with personality.  I would like Evie to beam again, to shine in her new body, to be herself.  When I do her faceup, I will be asking her guidance to make her as she wishes to be.  I know Evie likes plain and soft.  I have done her face so many times, I just know what she will look like.  The one face up that she had when she traveled with me on the truck was interesting because I think it reflected how she was feeling, alienated and estranged.  How has Evie evolved?  I do not have access to her many photo’s on this computer, but I do have her very first photo session after I brought her back from Denver Doll in 2006:

She had a ski jump nose and an anime style faceup by DIM.  Here is a clearer photo:

She’s had all kinds of changes since these first photo’s.  Her faceups have been pale and pinkish, dark and brooding and everything in between.  But always, always, she would look like my Evie, as though I could see her at every stage of life.  Sometimes she looked like a young teen, other times she looked like an adult.

She has been as changeable as the wind. Soft and sweet, crabby and disagreeable.  She’s been the best companion as far as a relationship goes, but I feel as though I don’t know her as well as I could.  Between my preoccupation with my own lifestyle change and her withdrawal in the last year, we have some making up to do!  I have been wondering if her younger self will bring out more nurturing in me?  More cheerfulness in her? Will things blossom and grow between us when there aren’t any others to interfere?  Will she play more?  Participate more?  Be happier? More crabby and sulky?  lol.  I feel her presence so strongly, it seems to grow by the day.

I think about the last time I was on home time, when I held her and played with wig changes, when I tried to feel a sense of her and she was barely there.  Like a ghost, she was just a whisper of a remembrance.  I didn’t know what to think or to do.  She says she is fading, and I understand.  I think a revival is in order!

Two Wonderful Joys to Behold

Yesterday I had wonderful news, my daughter told me that the baby is a girl!  I am so glad she decided to find out!  Now I can knit up a storm!  Here is my newest grandchild:

She weighs a pound and 6 ounces.  What a miracle we can see them before being born.

And then this morning, I see:

Evie’s body otherwise known as Seola 7 has arrived.  Apparently the weather is still really bad in Monument, but she made it and I can see my father signed for her.  I am so relieved she is safe and warm.  I wonder if Evie knows?  Perhaps I will sing Mairzy Doats and see what happens.

We are in Connecticut, on our way to Massachusetts for a beef delivery.  It’s raining and gray.  I don’t know if it is the weather or what it is, but my mood has been sinking again.  It’s such a hard thing to describe, but I feel that same melancholia that I feel when I leave a doll companion behind.  I have no dolls with me this time around, and as much as Olivia is fun and cute, holding a Pig is just not the same as a companion.  I need Evie.  I miss Audrey.  It’s going to be a long three weeks.  All I know for sure, is that after this, I will never be without a companion by my side ever again.

 

Attempted Delivery!

Ack!  A delivery attempt!  Just received an email from my mother, they had a snow storm yesterday that knocked the power out and they got 18 inches of snow with 4-9 yet to come.  Sigh, poor little Evie’s body, I hope the mailman kept her warm and reassured her that today is the day she arrives and stays.  I know, I am not making any sense, it’s just a body, right?  But Evie may already be in there?  I have no idea.  I haven’t heard from Evie since the last letter.

I am hanging in limbo.  Each day I study Seola photo’s.  Each day I think of how she will look, I imagine hair and eye combinations, clothing styles, the toys, the trunk, the bicycle.  It’s strange in a way, that all the dolly things I have, how they were fun for a picture or two, but they never had a definite purpose.  They remained props.  Now with the new direction, they seem to mean more.  Evie has had that pink bicycle for over a year, I photographed her with it once.  It seems just a bit small in scale for her, I now know it will be perfect for her smaller body.  I have items I thought would work for Olwen, now seem more appropriate for a younger girl, like a Hello Kitty lunch box.  I keep thinking about how all these things I kept, even when at the time it was too childish for Evie, or too big for Olwen.  I even kept a bunch of little girl dresses that fit Evie, but of course looked ridiculous.  I kept them without ever knowing that Evie would regress in time.  It’s marvelous marveling time for me!  lol

Oh, and Olivia says hi!

Long Hometime Coming Up and and Other Thoughts

As best I can tell, it looks like on the June 24th’s hometime estimate, I will stay behind at the apartment for nearly a month before leaving for Hawaii sometime in the last week of July.  I will stay there with my daughter and family until the first of September, hooking back up with my husband when he returns about Sept 6th.  I love the idea of being alone at the apartment for some rest off the truck, but it comes with a price….no internet for 2 months.  I am not even able to grasp the concept at all.  I have a lot of things planned to get done, but I am not so willing to not have my dolly fix on the net every day as I am use to!  We do not have a phone installed at the apartment, so I can’t take any free trial offers and husband will have the modem we use now.  Gasp.  I can’t stand the thought.

But I do relish having the time to myself for awhile.  I can sew and play and dream and eat when I want to, sleep when I want to….sigh.  I can shop without ever having to look at the clock.  I can go hang out at the Zoo or Garden of the Gods without looking at everything my husband looks at.  lol.  Rebellion Brewing!!!!!! 

Little Evie (Seola) is still in LA this morning.  It seems she’s been released from customs and getting routed to the plane to Denver.  We are heading to Connecticut right now, but if we get routed to Denver for a delivery before the official hometime, I will be angsting all over the place! 

I watched a old BAD film about a mad doctor killing his adulterous wife to prolong the life of his maid and make her young again.  It’s never explained why she goes from and old woman to a young one and still stays the maid…but there was all kinds of transference of souls to the point of there being a mix up.  I sure hope Evie gets this one right!  lol.  Hoping the film was just bad and they cut out the scenes that explained things.

One and Only Dream

Evie’s body is now in Los Angeles, in customs.  So the route was over the Pacific.  I hope the “retention” in customs is temporary.  I have never ordered from another country directly before, so I am unsure of the process.

Husband asked what name I had decided on, so I went ahead and told him what is going on with Evie and the transference that may happen and he surprised me by actually being interested and not thinking it was weird.  Before I even mentioned the one and only thing to him, he asked if that would mean Evie really could go to Hawaii if she were smaller.  Wow, I didn’t expect that from him!  I thought I would have to explain it out in detail and watch him look confused.  But nope….he went on about the machine that could accomplish this.  He thought we should build a transference-time machine.  It was fun talking about all the components it would need. 

Mom said that there was a big box at the house, so that must be her trunk.  I think when I get home, I will restack some of the unpacked boxes in the bedroom to the other side of the room and set up a table by my side of the bed with Evie’s room placed on it. 

I’ve got a list going about all the things I need to get done while on this hometime, mostly preparing the remaining dolls for adoption, packing them up and so on.  I also want to see if any of Evie’s grownup clothes can be refitted to little Evie.  I have a pair of jeans I can cut up to make jumper style jeans for her younger form and a few pairs of summer shorts too.  I plan on cutting out a few summer dresses that I can hand finish on the truck.  I am so excited,  the whole concept seems to be flowing in the right direction. 

Another thought I had last night was how Miette and Charlotte will fulfill my need for Victorian life, how lovely that will be to make them dainty things now and then without any pressure to get it all done now.  Both have comfortable rooms and lovely things and not in desperate need for anything.  That leaves Evie free to be herself in the modern world, without my attempts to dress her in old fashioned clothing.  I see so many Seola’s dressed in old fashioned styles, and while it suit her pensive countenance, I think she will be happiest with being comfortable for traveling and playing.  I will work on a more play oriented wardrobe for her. I still find it amusing that I already have just about everything I can perceive of her needing.  From toys to clothes to furniture, I have it all. 

My last decision will be about Audrey and Hammie.  I cannot make that decision yet, I am not ready.  It will come one day on it’s own.  I am in no hurry.  At this moment, I cannot imagine letting them go, but I want this to see how Evie settles in and how it makes me feel before I can take the next step.

I did have a dream last night about opening the door of the house we were living in and seeing all these beautiful stars and lights swirling around us in the night, it was so magical and beautiful and I called my husband to come and look at it.  I had a wonderful sense of peace, like we would soon take a new journey out there amoung the stars and light and that all I had to do is go and get my doll, in the dream it was just one and so easy to pickup and go.  I couldn’t see the face of the doll, but it was the one I loved the most.

SHIPPING NOTICE!

I just checked, and Seola 7 has been shipped!  Wow, that is the fastest I have ever seen!  EMS tracking is different than US tracking, I can even see the flight number of the plane!  lol

 I am so relieved to know she will be there when I go back on hometime.  I wonder how Evie is doing and what effects this will have on her.  I wonder how this will all come together.  It may all fall apart too, but I still have very good feelings about it.

If this transference works, I will be so thrilled that Evie will be able to go to Hawaii with me and experience the birth of my grandchild.  Shared experiences, that is what I want so badly these days.  Full participation, full companionship of a beloved doll. 

More later, I need to lie down for a bit, we may have night driving again tonight.